An Open Letter To The Man At The Gas Station

Dear Man at the Gas Station,
I would first like to let you know that I am not a crazy woman. Yet.
It will be folks like you who actually drive me up to that ledge and push me over.

Let me explain, Mr. Gas Station Man. I have a chatty husband. A very chatty husband. And when he starts talking, there's no stopping him.
When he called me the other day, I was just pulling into the gas station parking lot. Remember?... You were standing there, pumping your gas, and my Mr. Chatty was just getting started. Chat, chat, chat, chat, chatty, chat, chat.

So.... I got tired of sitting there and being unproductive. That gas was not gonna pump itself. So, yep. You saw me. I got out of my car right across from you and pumped the gas whilst ON THE PHONE.

Remember that little "warning" you yelled to me? I didn't like it.
"HEY! You're not supposed to talk on the phone at the gas pump!"
You were a bit rude. And I think I had PMS.
You see, Mr. Gas Station Man, you need to work on your approach.
You didn't tell me to be careful in a kind voice. You didn't seem concerned for my well-being... like a grandfatherly type fellow.

In fact, you didn't seem concerned at all for me... You actually seemed worried that I was gonna use my cell phone to blow the gas pumps to Kingdom Come. And take you with me.

Mr. Gas Station Man, I've seen the little stickers with the little stick people telling me not to use the cell phone while pumping gas.



But I have a question for you. With 92% of the free world using cellular phones and driving cars... why aren't gas pumps blowing up all over the world?

And I have another question. Do you yell at the dude who's SMOKING while pumping his gas? I sure hope so, because HE scares me.

Since Dan/Daddy the Chatty was on the other end of the call, he heard you.
And he heard me... ranting and raving like a lunatic about the good citizen putting the smack down on cell phone use at the gas pump. I think he was a tiny bit worried about you, Mr. Gas Station Man. Maybe the cold weather was getting to me. Maybe the gas prices had me stressed out.

Now please don't label me a criminal. Ask anyone who knows me... I am the most law-abiding person they know. I hate breaking rules, and I break out in a cold sweat at the thought of doing something wrong.
But that day at the gas pump, I just needed to finish my phone call AND get gas.

I checked. It's not against the law to use a cell phone at the gas pump in our state. There is no danger of fire from cell phone use. (It's the static electricity that builds up on us when we slide out of our cars that can cause a spark.)

I'm no expert, but I happen to know folks who are.



"Using one’s cell phone while pumping gas/petrol can cause an explosion."

Busted.

"A properly-working cell phone poses almost no danger of igniting gasoline, even when surrounded by gasoline vapor with the optimum fuel-air mix for ignition. The actual risk comes from an electrostatic discharge between a charged driver and the car, often a result of continually getting into and out of the vehicle."

So... Mr. Gas Station Man, I guess this is my way of saying I'm sorry. I am not sorry for talking on my phone, but I am sorry for scaring you a little bit. Or a lot.
Maybe you'll think twice the next time you feel the need to yell out to a stranger in a not-nice voice.
You just may be yelling to a PMSing 40-year old woman on her cell phone who is standing in the cold trying to talk to her overly chatty husband and pay for gas that's entirely too expensive.

Sincerely,
Autumn