If Al Roker Needs An Intern, I Am Available

Well according to some fancy fat rodent named Phil, Spring will arrive early this year.  I'm not sure how I feel about this.  Winter gives me a good excuse to wear comfy clothes and EATALLTHEFOOD.  An early Spring means I need to lose 50 pounds and get a spray tan.  I am not ready.
The weather here in Tennessee lately reminds me of myself... Confused and weird.  A little over a week ago, we had 7+ inches of snow which kept us cooped up in the house for about 5 days.  This past weekend, it was almost 70 degrees.  And today, we have tornado warnings.  I have taken to watching The Weather Channel like I'm living in a retirement home.  Call me when it's time for Bingo.

This time last year, when Snowmaggedon hit, the boy and I made a few videos of ourselves sledding.  I put one or two on Facebook because they were funny, and we were bored.  Y'all.  Those "Snow Day" videos took on a life of their own.  In just a few hours, people were texting, calling, and messaging me asking when we were going to post a new one.  At first we were flattered, and it was fun.  Then we felt like we needed to produce a new video every day, each one funnier than the last.
This year, when the weatherfolk started talking about "significant accumulation" for our area, the calls and the texts and the messages started.  Peer pressure is alive and well.

The snow on the first day was too fluffy.  The next day was all ice, so I videoed the boy making a smoothie. (Desperate times called for desperate measures.)  My friend, J, texted me and said, "Y'all are losing your touch."  Even Dad/Daddy said we needed to "step up the game" with our sledding and snow videos.  Everybody's a critic.
On the 3rd and 4th days, we were able to get out and sled. 

To keep our audiences happy, we tried various ways of sliding down the hill, including piggy back.  The things we do to keep people entertained.

Dan/Daddy said we need another sled.  I 'm not sure we would have as much fun with two sleds. We definitely would not be as cold, wet, and injured.  Becoming an icy human pretzel is always a good time.

Now that we are having a February heat wave, there are nasty storms rolling through.  Our downstairs is partially underground, so that is where we go when the weather warnings start.  We also put the pets in their crates and put them in the downstairs bathroom. 

When the first tornado sirens went off, I asked the boy to help me get the cat and crate her up for the evening.  She was hiding under his bed.  It's too bad I didn't have the camera rolling for the half hour we crawled around in the floor. 
We shooed her to one side, and she would scoot to the other side.  I poked at her with a Nerf Gun, and she hissed at me.  The boy was able to grab her front legs, and she arched her back up into the space under the mattress, making it impossible to drag her out.  When we finally got her out and put her in the pet crate, she was perfectly fine, but the boy had a headache, and I had a crick in my neck from crawling under the bed.  It was big fun.
The local news weather forecasters always say we should have a "severe weather plan" in case of severe weather.  Well I have one, but I might need to tweak the part about getting the pets to safety.

I would hate to perish in a tornado because I was caught up in a cat rodeo.

Falling Socks And Sweet Tea

This time last week, I was motivated.  I was ready to get back into a routine, I was de-Christmasing the house, and I was on a cleaning streak that would make Martha Stewart cry.
Today I am on my 3rd cup of coffee, I am trying to decide if the dog can go one more day without a bath, and I am annoyed with all winter sock selections.
I watched the Golden Globe Awards last night, and now I am obsessed with trying to figure out how folks in Hollywood age in reverse.  I know... it's personal trainers and personal nutritionists and designer clothes and loads of Botox, but OHMYWORD... The beautiful people get more beautiful.

And, to top it all off, I haven't won the Powerball.

I am so glad I did not make any New Year's Resolutions this year, because the New Year Resolution Police would have locked me up by now.  I know I need to exercise more, eat better, be nicer, and lose many pounds.  Making a real list of things to do that I should already be doing is not going to motivate me.  If I'm not doing it already, what good is "resolving" to do it?  It works for a lot of people; it just does not work for me.
On January 2, I got a text from my sis-in-law...  She had been discussing New Year's Resolutions and goals with my nephew.  These are my nephew's goals for the new year:
1.  Eat more chocolate
2.  Rest on the couch daily with BBQ chips and sweet tea from Chick Fil-A.

Amen.  And Amen. 
Now those are goals I can get behind.  Those are goals I could achieve and achieve easily.  I love my nephew, but now I feel like we are kindred souls.

Now back to that sock issue.  I love Winter and all things that go with it, especially boots.  But I am having a sock conundrum.  The sock choices are endless... Cute, warm, colored, patterned, lace-trimmed, fuzzy, fleece-lined, sassy, and adorable... But none of them will stay UP.  I put them on, head out the door, and within 20 minutes, I am yanking them back up to where they should be.  Does anyone out there feel my pain?  Or have you all discovered the best socks in the world and have kept them a secret?  I try to blame my chunky calves, but then I realize there are gals with chunkier calves than me who never seem to have a sock issue.  I have tried different brands and different styles, and I am spending way too much time pulling up my socks.  I am open for suggestions.

So if I had to make a list of New Year's Resolutions, it would look like this:
1.  Find socks that stay up
2.  Become a famous Hollywood actress so I can age in reverse, too
3.  Win the Powerball
4.  Bathe the dog

If all that falls apart, you will find me on the couch with some BBQ chips and some sweet tea from Chick Fil-A.

The End of 2015

Well Happy 2016.  Christmas was 14 days ago, and New Year's Eve is a blurry memory.  Let me clear that up... New Year's Eve is a blurry memory because I am old and boring and went to bed before midnight.  It's not a blurry memory because I partied too hard.  Unless "partying" involves wrapping your scaredy-cat dog tightly in a blanket to keep her from having a firework-induced doggie heart attack.  If that's "partying," then put me in rehab.

Christmas was big fun, and we made the annual travels to see all our people.  We saw Dan/Daddy's family in Florida, spent 3 days at home in Tennessee, and then went to see my family in South Carolina.  Everywhere we went, it was hot.  And humid.  No one could stop talking about the Christmas heat wave.  To say I was not a fan of the weather would be a huge understatement.  I don't even like hot humid weather when it's supposed to be hot and humid.  Blah.  No one wants to sip hot cocoa by the cozy fire.  No one wants to wear their new sweaters and fuzzy socks.  Christmas 2015 will forever be known as The Christmas We All Sweated.

The boy made cookies with his Nana... A tradition they continued with the AC on.  And while wearing funky cat t-shirts, apparently.  Meowy Christmas.

 

 

Dan/Daddy's grandmother loves having us over to her house for presents and deserts.  Grandmas can rock a Christmas sweatshirt even in a heat wave.  I would have been a puddle.

In SC, this is the only picture I was able to get of my nephew and the boy.  The rest of the photos were blurry because my nephew is 7, and never stops moving.  This was also 4.2 seconds before he peeled off his shirt and opened all his Christmas presents semi-nude.  Did I mention it was hot?

Church selfies.  Please don't judge.  Look at my sweet mom, smiling at the boy... She loves having us all home and able to go to church with her.  But her sweet daughter and other grandson are goofing off.  Church is obviously the best place for all of us.

 

 



Once we were home from all our Christmas travels, we rang in the New Year with football games and large amounts of cheese.  The boy was out celebrating at a friend's house, so Dan/Daddy and I watched TV and grew roots to the couch.  I did about 40 loads of laundry, but that's not glamorous, so I'm trying to forget it.  I made the executive decision to watch the ball drop in New York, and being a fan of Eastern Time, I went to bed at 11:20 pm. 
I said, "If it's 2016 in New York, that's good enough for me." 
Dan/Daddy said, "It's been 2016 in Australia since this morning... Why did you even get up?"  There's always a critic.

I hope your Christmas was cold and full of fun.
I also hope your New Year's Eve was half as exciting as mine.